The missing skill
Forgoing critical thinking is a double edge sword, and it swings both ways. One day your viewpoint is on top and someone else is on the bottom. The righteousness felt is unparalleled. You knew it all along that this was the way. This is the answer. At last, everyone else can see the light.
Except they can’t. They are just waiting for their turn to be on top and be right.
They feel complete indignation at being on the bottom and after a short rest to quell their anger and fatigue at fighting for their positions, they plan new ways to stay on top for longer the next time they are there. And they will be.
Without critical thinking, people simply speak to convince.
Think back to a time someone tried vehemently to convince you that something you believed in was false or visa versa. How did you feel? Did you react with curiosity and temperance? With the belief that you could, at any point learn something new without having to question your authenticity? Probably not.
When someone at a dinner party tries to convince another that X is the only way to achieve Y and that what they are currently doing is wrong, 1 of 2 things usually happens;
They feel attacked and double down on their beliefs. Maybe they return fire and try to convince them.
They feel attacked and question their entire identity. What if they are wrong and have wasted their time?
There are however 2 other options;
They listen with curiosity and consider if there is anything worth following up on.
They listen with curiosity knowing that another’s viewpoint do not effect their authenticity or character.
We can disagree without disbelieving and we can agree without making it our identity.
When we speak to convince, we push our counterpart further away. The further away they are the more we have to shout our message, and nobody enjoys being shouted at.
When I was in school, we learned how to make an apple crumble and about The Tudors. Looking back, I wish we would have learned how to open a bank account and to think critically. My life, and society in general, would probably be much better off if we had.
